The Abolition of Smoking and its Consequences

Please don't read this if you have recently quit smoking

The abolition of smoking and its consequences have been a disaster for the human race. While smoking has not been properly banned, the introduction of vast cigarette taxes and the widespread public information campaign — which has so cruelly exposed many to infohazards — have effectively killed the habit.

One simple fact is clear: smoking is cool. Look at these groovy dudes. They might be dying, but they look damn fine doing it. This is what they took from you, we were never asked etc etc. Why do certain things look cool? No doubt it has to do with evolutionary psychology. Would a potential mate gnawing on a mammoth bone not be a very attractive sight? Could the same be said for a potential leader? Who can say. Perhaps we once mated with dragons and the production of smoke through the mouth reminds us of this deep within our brains, such mysteries are lost to time.

Beyond the coolness of smoking, it was an essential part of the social fabric. Offering someone a cigarette was a sure-fire way to strike up a conversation — even the term ‘strike up’ comes from matches for this very reason. Young people today have fewer friends and are having less sex than at any time after the invention of smoking, could this simply be a coincidence?

Errrr anyway, I thought I could come up with some more points but nothing is coming to mind right now so, errrrr, bye!